Photo Credit: Jim Larrison @ https://www.flickr.com/photos/larrison/14866933889. License: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/ Modifications: Changed shop name to NOVELISTS  at top of photo

I didn’t say a good novel. I just said a novel. A steady string of new titles once a year for the rest of your life. So here you go, the last piece of writing advice you’ll ever need. Lest you forget this (and I’m definitely paying homage to stealing this idea from Craig Vetter) FIND SOMEWHERE TO TATOO THIS ON YOUR BODY. While you’re finding a good ink shop, let me share my advice:

1. Find a comfortable chair. Sit in it for a PROTECTED amount of time every day. Don’t let anything, or anyone, convince you that it’s more important than this block of writing time. And now that you’ve found a comfortable chair, and a sacred time to write, do this…

Write. 

Don’t ask me what, and please holy mother of all gods don’t ask me how to get over writer’s block. Just write. And then write again. And then perform the same task over and over again in lieu of all the interesting things your weak human mind will remind you you are missing while you are trying to be a “writer.”

If after a few pages you discover you are not that interesting, which you very well might unless you have been writing a long time, you definitely cannot afford to miss a day feeling sorry for yourself. You have a lot of bad writing to get out of you before you become competent, and then a lot of merely competent writing to get out before you write something inspired. Having fun yet?

Or maybe not. Maybe you will jump from here to there like a kangaroo on ‘roids, and the very next thing you write, or maybe the one right after that, will kick some serious artistic ass (usually pronounced arse) and you will enjoy the fame and fortune you seek, and no doubt deserve, much sooner than my surly middle-aged approach suggests. But guess what? You still have to sit down and write to get from here to there, even if far fewer times than I’m suggesting.

All joking aside (a place I am loathe to hang out, so please don’t make me stay here any longer than needed), I have a question:

Is it really advice you seek, or inspiration?

Three guesses where you find inspiration.

Better get started.